#12
Phil: Nice game of chicken, Claire. She's gone!
Claire: She is coming back. I am almost positive.
Phil: Why do I listen to you? Why? You were wrong about the iPod being a failure. You were wrong about tomato being a vegetable. I don't even want to talk about your favorite "Planet" Pluto!
Haley:You were going to let me go with him?
Claire: Isn't that what you wanted, honey?
Haley: What's the matter with you?! You've been acting so weird ever since I left college!
Claire: For the record, you didn't leave college. You were asked to leave.
Haley: Oh, which you guys never let me forget, especially dad.
Claire: Honey, your father...
Haley: Oh, you don't have to tell me what he thinks, okay? I'm a huge disappointment to him. I see it on his face every day. He acts as if he doesn't even want me around.
Phil: Give me the ticket for the car.
Claire: Phil...
Phil: I'm going after her! This little chicken game may work for your dad, but it doesn't work for me. That's my little girl. I need her to know that no guy on earth is good enough for her, let alone some slimy, middle-aged jean salesman!
Phil: What's this?
Claire: Just enjoy it.
Jay: There's all kinds of milestones in life. The kind you expect to live through... The first kiss. Birthdays. Graduations. If you're lucky, a wedding or two. Or even a new addition to the family. You never dreamed you'd get to live through again. And that's the best kind of all. Why am I spoiling it for you? You'll see for yourself.
#22
Haley: Uh, what do you think you're doing out there?
Alex: I'm flirting.
Haley: That's what I was afraid of.
Alex: Look, I'm not gonna pretend I'm stupid just so a boy will like me.
Haley: Of course not. But you don't have to put the poor guy to shame. Flirting with boys is about increasing your value, not decreasing theirs.
Alex: That's a complicated thought. What magazine taught you that?
Haley: You're doing it again! The mean things. Can you even hear it or what?!
Alex: I heard it.
Haley: Good. So now that he knows that you're smart, let's work on being nice.
Haley & Alex: We won!
Boy A & B: Man, that sucks! Yeah, totally un-masculating.
Alex: Well, at least you guys look cool when you play.
Boy A & B: Let's play again. This never happened.
Haley: Actually, we need to go hang out with our family for a while.
Boy A & B: Really? Now?
Haley: Yeah, but we'll be around. We'll see you guys.
Alex: What happened? Did I mess up?
Haley: No, you did great.
Alex: So he didn't like me?
Haley: No, he totally liked you.
Alex: Then why'd we walk away?
Haley: This was never about him. This was about getting you some confidence. Guys will pick up on that. Better guys. Guys who can lose to a girl without feeling e-masculated.
Alex: Okay, try not to throw this in my face one day, but sometimes you're actually really smart. Like, smart smart. I hope you know that.
Haley: And I'm totally throwing that in your face one day. Are you kidding?
Jay: Good guy.
Cam: Who -- Teddy? Yeah. Yeah, he's the best.
Jay: Nuts he can't find anybody, huh? Gotta be something a little off there. He definitely did not bring out the best in Mitchell, I can tell you that right now.
Cam: Oh, really? Well, you know, not that it matters... but in what way exactly?
Jay: Honestly? When they were together, Mitchell could be a bit of pill. Now, I like Teddy, but when they broke up, I was actually kinda glad. Of course , Mitchell thought that I was uncomfortable because of the gay thing, and maybe I was, but... I really just wanted him to be happy. Like he is now. And when you two started up, everyone thought, "Well, there it is."
#Okay, kids. Couples skate. Grab someone you love and get out there.#
Cam: Jay, you can be so...
Jay: I'm not skating with you, Cam.
Cam: Yeah.
Claire: What about me, dad? You wanna skate with me?
Manny: What qualifies someone as a hero? Obviously, a hero has to be someone we respect. A person we look up to. A person who is generous of spirit. Who's willing to grow and learn. Maybe it's the person you love most in the world or the guy who makes the most out of life, no matter what anyone thinks. For me, though... The hero in my family is my family because of who we are together.
C-. "This was not the assignment." I'll tell you who is not my hero, Mrs. Rita Mcnabb.
#24
Phil: My daughter Alex would like to pay tribute.
Alex: My grandmother and I had a very special bond. This may not make sense to everyone, but I'm pretty sure she would've loved it.
"This is a lighter. It belonged to my favorite actor, Paul Newman. One day, he came into the restaurant where I was waitressing and accidentally left it behind. For the first time in my life, I did something I wasn't supposed to and slipped it into my pocket. One of the customers saw and said, "don't worry. Your secret's safe with me." That customer turned out to be the love of my life, your grandfather. So, my Alex, who I love so dearly, who is probably too much like me for her own good, every once in a while, don't be afraid to break the rules. You never know what can happen."
